Non-stop, sweet, and gross (Gross pictures herein)

My little 20 month old is non-stop. From the moment he wakes up until you force him to sleep at night he is constantly on the go.  We practically have to force him to sit down to eat. He doesn't even want to sit then. He much rather play puppy. One of the only moments whe he will be still is when he is nursing. Which is only 2-3 times a day now, we are slowly weaning. He climbs up everything, drags chairs around to reach things up high, jumps off of whatever he has climbed on and hopes someone will catch him. And of course follows his big sister around and wants to do everything she does.

He is also incredibly sweet. He will call to you and pat the place he wants you to sit so he can be near you. He will hold your hand while riding in the grocery cart. He is so proud when he masters new words. This week's words were "bug" and "book". 

He is also incredibly gross. E never explored her diapers when they were poopy. But Tank is a little obsessed with poop.  Thankfully he has only gotten into his diaper once. But he constantly asks us "poop?" When we are in the restroom, or if he hears a fart. He got his  finger slammed in the front door a few weeks back and today his fingernail came off in one piece. I think there is one growing back. At least I hope so. His tubes are also a source of disgust. He has a head cold and the left ear has decided to turn into a faucet. It's like he has a runny nose, out his ear. Hopefully this just means the tubes are doing their job.

But for all his gross I will still take his sloppy baby kisses any day. 

One whole baby fingernail....blech 

Well...the tubes work

Moana with E

watching movies with a highly inquisitive, loquacious 4 year old is not for the easily frustrated.
I'm afraid my child is going to be that person in a movie theater who talks to the screen and asks loud questions. Despite her tendency to narrate/ask questions through the entire movie, I love family movie night.  Tonight we watched Moana and recorded everything E said to the best of my ability. So, here is my transcript of Movie Night: Moana with E:

It's Maui!

Te-fiti cant hear him.

Run Maui run!

I wish I had a fishhook

Lava

Where is Maui? Why is he not in the water?

Why is that a mother?

Where's Maui?

Why did he say 'I'm gonna throw up?'

Why does Moana have a diaper?

Why does she have a necklace too?

She says 'I wanna get the shell'

I see sea turtle spots

Why did the baby sea turtle say that?

Why does his flippers go round and round?

She's gonna drop a she'll

She's dropping shells

WHY is she dropping shells?

Squirt and crush!

Why did the ocean start a big head?

Why did she say that?

Why?

What's that thing?

Why?

Why?

What are those guys doing?

Why?

What do they use?

Why did Pua do that?

Why did heihei get in the fire?

Why did people see Moana?

Haha! Village crazy lady!

She's grown up!

Why did he get a tattoo? Why did he get lots of tattoos?

Woah, that's a lot of chiefs!

That was loud. Her people were loud! Loud.

What was that?

Why did he say that?

Mom, why did some of the darkness get into the coconuts?

What is husking?

Why are they sad?

I like Maui.

Why is he mad?

Why did she throw sticks into the sand?

Why are they sad?

5 toes, 6toes, 7toes, 8 toes, 9toes 10 toes

Why did a kid wave to Moana?

Why did she pick up a stone?

But now she put it back. Why?

Why is she gonna slide?

Why is there a broken place?

What were those puff puff things?

Yes, so bad!

Swim, Moana, swim!

Why did she get hurt on her foot?

Why did he run away from the paddle?

Why did wind knock the boat over?

Gramma tala!

Woah!

She's just a little person and the boats are really big!

Why is she under a boat?

Maui!

Why are some boats ripped?

It's nighttime right?

Wow that's a really bug boat!

How many times?

3 times., right daddy?

Sings in "Hawaiian"

Why did he do it daddy?

That's means their island is...

That's their island!

Some of the darkness!

Mom, I bet a rock's face is like teka 

Ready mom?

Nope!

Who?

Why is she dying?

How old?

Why are they all sad?

Why did Maui steal the heart?

Why?

She's taking that one, why?

It's darkness..no it's gramma

I thought it was darkness but they thrower her out into the ocean right?

Where's the fishhook?

Why is it in front of her?

Heihei!

Oh no!

It's unstoppable!

Why are there lots of waves?

Mom, who is gonna help her?

Fog!

She won't be able to see!

No!

In the sand!

Why?

Maybe that's Anna.

Fishhook!

Why was he scared?

1000 years

Thank you!

*sings and dances to You're welcome"*

Why do maui's tattoos move?

*resumes dancing and singing*

Boat snack!

Maui broke!

I could watch that all day

Wonder what they're here for...

How can their boat turn into more boats?

Why aren't they gonna get the chicken?

Escaping!

Run Moana! Run!

Mom, lets have a movie snack while we are watching the movie.

Maui!

Why did Maui say that?

When is gonna stand up?

Why did he pee in the ocean?

That's just a dream.

Where's Maui?

Where's her house?

Run chief tui! Run!

 What's the moms name?

Why lalotai?

I can say lalota

Where is their boat?

That's a really high mountain? Why?

Why are there bad guys?

Why?

What's that?

What did he do?

What are haka?

It ate them! It eated them!

Why did it glow when she hit it?

Thanks tree!

What are those?

What's that?

Where is tomatoa's head?

Why?

He's so strong?

Where's the leg that Maui broke off?

Why are there fish?

Why did she say that?

Did you like the song?

Who is gonna help him flip over?

What did his fishhook do?

Is that the way to teka?

Te-ka and Te-fiti are different?

Hey Mom do the thing that Moana just did!

Why is mauis little buddy afraid?

Why is he mad and sad?

 My pillow!

When did she say Maui you're so amazing!?

Why are they both sad?

Why is his buddy happy?

When things are too big he knocks them down!

What are those mountains for?

Silly ocean!

He teached her how to sail?

Why is Maui bigger than Moana?

What's a Demi god?

Human god!

Maybe that's Te-ka's smoke.

Is it Te-ka's smoke?

Te-ka!

Te-ka!

His hook tried to stop it from hitting them?

What do the lava balls do, from hitting them?

Why is he sad?

Why is he mad?

What are gods?

Why do hawks have big wings?

Why is the boat still?

When is it gonna move?

No...NO!

Why is it making that glow mom?

Gramma.

Where is her feet?

Where is her feet

Why?

Is the darkness in the voyager island?

Are they dead?

What happens to them in the darkness?

Are they starving?

I can see her feet now!

What does te-ka ruin the boat?

Why did she turn back into a human?

This is a long movie!

Her dad!

They are going backwards?

Why is their boat going backwards?

It's going forward.

Why are all the boats going faster?

They are starving right now, that's why they are pretend dead.

They are pretend deaf.

She got some sand too.

Gramma?

She's not talking.

Now she's going fast.

Is Te-ka going to see her at day, or night?

There's her darkness!

Moana is not starving.

Why?

It got in the place where Moana was going to get to.,

She can shape shift!

Yeah she can.

Go Moana!

She's trying to defeat Te-ka.

She's trying to play with Te-ka. Play!

They made it! Where's Te-is!

Where's heihei?

Why is heihei floating away?

One more hit then her boat is gone.

 It she's all rock!

Shark-head!

Why is it not over yet?

The ocean stopped it from hitting her!

Which spiral?

Kapow! Right Mom?

Where's Te-Kas barrier?

*Imitates mauis haka.*

Mauis a little sad right now.

Why?

Where's her feet?

They're going slow. Why?

What does unstoppable mean?

This is not who you are...you know who you are.

Her eyes are still lava, right Mom.

Te-ka.

Trees are growing!

I thought she took a long time.

Why did he say that?

Chee-ho!

Why did he say that?

Where's her flower?

The flower in her hair.

What about the flower her mom gave her?

That's a real island. Tefiti is a real island.

Why is Maui sad?

Why can't we see his hawk foot prints?

Pink flower!

Now there's a new rule. They get to be out in the ocean again.

Her shell. The rock is gonna crack her shell

She's the new chief. Her dad is the old chief. Her mom is the other old chief.

When I die I'll become a hawk.

Let's listen to the credits, and I want to see tanatoa

Mauis fishhook!

Moana necklace!

Mauis necklace!

Moana sail

Flowerband!

Boat sail!

Maui lizard!

Gramma atlas hook

Kakamoras thing.

What's that?

Turtle!

Coral

Kakamora!

Flower!

Maui!

Blow dart in my butt cheek!

Maui  fish!

Tamatoa 

Moanas boat sail

Moanas shell

Maui fish!

Monster!

Tamatoa!

The drum!

Heart of tefiti!

A flower.

Let's dance!

Come on!

Turtle. Turtle. Squirt and crush, crush and squirt

Fish

Crush

Fish fish fishfishfish 

Fishy?

Hammerhead shark!

Pink flower!

More flowers

Flower

Flower, flower, art!

When is this Mom? (Referring to the song)

Flower, flower.

When is this?

I'm the village crazy lady!

We didn't hear it. I'm the village crazy lady.

Flowe, leaf, leaf leaf leaf 

What's this One?now what's this one?

Mom, tefiti restores!

Diamond, art, leaf, art, leafleafleafleaf!

Mom, who's that man right there?

There is his leg that broke off.

 I would help Tamatoa!

Sweet siblings

 

E is now four and five months and tank is 18 months old. And he LOVES his big sister.

I ride too!

Everything  she does, he wants to do. Every toy she plays with, he wants it.  Because of his big sister, he's  obsessed with Paw Patroll and knows all the words to "let it go."

 He loves her. And she loves him too, though she gets frustrated with him. But he is relentless in his pursuit of her attention. When he wants her to be with him he will go up to her and take her hand.  He loves to walk hand-in-hand with her. Which makes for some pretty sweet moments. 

 I hope that as they grow up they continue to be best friends. 

9 months strong

Oh, poor neglected second child. I have blog posts in the works for his other months, well maybe one or two of them,  I mostly comprised of list of things that I want to talk about but just never got around to sitting down and writing. And now Mr. Man is nine months old.

 And he is amazing at nine months. We still call him tank but he's actually pretty little. He looks massive until you put him by another baby, then he's tiny; so maybe he's tiny tank.  He's in nine month old clothes and size 3 diapers. He's only 27 inches tall and only 17 lbs. 13 oz. but he is so awesome.

He's an eater, all day all night. About every three hours or he gets hangry, he likes his solids too.  Haven't found anything that he doesn't like yet and he always wants to eat when someone else is eating. If you have a snack he better be willing to share or face the wrath of tiny tank.  And he's a food critic. He talks the most when he has something in his mouth he loves to shriek and squeal and babbling talk he loves to do it most when he's eating. Both solids and milk which is kind of funny.  We did have our first biting incident now that he has two teeth. He did not like the response of being told no and being put down on the ground. Thankfully he hasn't bitten again since.

 He's not much of a sleeper, mostly because he wants to eat instead. He still gets up two to three times a night.  We started to sleep train him, Ferber style, and he goes to bed without a fuss now for the most part. When he wakes up in the middle of the night we give him a few minutes to try to sort himself out. But he usually just ends up screaming for the entire time. At some point I'll have to night wean,  The part of night winning is increasing food during the day and he already eats every 2 to 3 hours plus solids during the day. He sleeps in his crib all night which is a big change from previous where he would need to be in our bed or at least in our arms so that's a big improvement even if he's still getting up.

 He is strong. Walking is imminent, he can stand unassisted,  he can walk when you hold his hands. And he loves to climb on things. We never anchored our furniture to the wall for E,  but we're going to have to with tank. Because he will climb anything and everything. He's been going to Little gym class and he loves it there. One  of his favorite things to do is crawl. Everywhere as fast as he can.  He gets into a lot of mischief at home. Especially since there are lots of toys left out by a certain 3 1/2 year-old. One of his favorite things to do is eat paper or stickers. He has a special noise that he makes when he has paper or stickers in his mouth it's sort of a NumYummyYum noise that he doesn't make when he's eating food.

He like to play games. The standards like peekaboo and this little piggy of course,  but he also likes to play fetch with himself. Whatever toy he has he'll throw them and crawl across  the floor to get it. He also has a little game where he will tell his head to the side and smile and stare at you until you tilt your head back and then he'll pop up and then fall back down expecting you to do the same, it's very cute.

 He loves other people. He loves to smile at people laugh at people and be held by people even complete random strangers. And of course strangers love to hold him because he so happy and, of course, the hair.  The hair is almost grown back to link it wasn't like that at three months ago. The curls are still gone, which makes me a little sad, but he still has a really good hair for a nine-month-old.

 He loves bath time in the pool and would spend all his time in the water if we let him. He does not like being in his playpen when people are out of sight or being alone in general. It is not like getting his diaper changed or putting on clothes.  He does not like being strapped into his car seat.  He does not like it when mommy takes the paper or stickers out of his mouth. He did great on his first airplane flights only fussing a little bit and sleeping for most of the flights.

E's wisdom: sadness

hey mommy, when you are sad your heart splits apart.
But you can fix it with cuddles and hugs.

Baseball fever

We had another first for E. We got to take her to her first major-league  baseball game. Her uncle is a huge baseball fanatic and was in town visiting. The Astros just happen to be playing that afternoon. She spent the morning with her uncle watching baseball videos  mostly videos of the mascots. The Astros mascot is named orbit and he's based off of the Phillies mascot name the Philly flyer. E very proudly can do the Philly flyer dance where the Philly Flyer shakes his belly around vigorously. 

E was super excited to go to the game. When we got there we found out that the roof was open and our seats were right in the bright sun. It was hot and it was sweaty; the remedy for that is of course a giant putple snow cone.  E charmed the people around us by shouting encouragement to the team "you can do it!" "He did it". "Hit the ball!"  And just in general being a super well behaved kiddo. 

Tank also continue to charm people with his luscious locks. As we were trying to get a swaddle blanket over his head to keep him cool a couple behind us handed us a toddler size Astros baseball cap and told us they had bought it for their son and we could borrow it for the game. About 20 minutes later they told us they were leaving and that we could keep the hat.  So Tank is well on his way in following in his big sisters footsteps of getting lots of free stuff for being cute. 

. 

 All throughout the game E was looking for Orbit. Every time she went into the shade to get a drink or to go to the bathroom and cool off Orbit would appear somewhere in the stands. By the time she come back he disappeared again. Uncle Rune even went on an Orbit finding mission, and came back with a guaranteed sighting time; the seventh inning stretch.

Of course since Tank had a hat E wanted to get a hat. And she wanted to play in the big kids play area. By the bottom of the 5th the game was starting to drag and it was getting really hot so we went to the gift store and the big kids play area. E got a bit scared because the play area was filled wi crazy big kids, so we didn't stay long. But it was just long enough for us to miss the grand slam play that won the Astros the game.
At the 7th inning stretch, Orbit was finally spotted by Ms. E, and at that point we were all pretty hot and tired so we called it a game and headed out.

E has already started asking when we can go back to go see anothe baseball game. 

Just another day...

Today was just another day...

 Another day of waking up early after not enough sleep, making food, changing diapers, shuffling kids around, playing Dinotrux,  brushing three-year-old teeth, trips to the library, a little too much screen time.  There was nothing outstandingly awesome, but I want to remember.  It was outstandingly awesome and it's just another day-ness.

 It was a little bit extra awesome because we had the day off from school. And thankfully we are far enough north that the flooding wasn't too bad in our area. The water came up about 2 feet onto our front lawn and flooded the floor mats of our car parked on the street. But today was beautiful.  I am so thankful for where we live, that were not dealing with the crazy flooding or scary things that happen in other parts of the town. And I am so grateful for the extra day I got to spend with my kids even though it wasn't anything spectacular.

 I want to remember the ordinary things today: playing with Tank's hair and stayling up into a kind of Mohawk. Snuggling with E and reading lots and lots of stories. How she came back repeatedly during storytime at the library to give Tank hugs and snuggles just because she loved him.  How she danced and try to tickle the librarian during the sing-along part of story time. How she was so careful of the other little kids at story time because she's one of the big kids there now.   How in the middle of one of the sing-along songs she gave the little girl next to her a big giant hug. The way she says hello to everyone because she's friendly, ans she always wants to know their names. The way she yells at motorcycle riders who don't wear their helmets that they're not making a good choice. The fact the Tank ate his entire bowl of baby oatmeal for the first time. the way Tank's hair smells after having washed out all that product since it needed to be shampooed three times.  E holding my hand as I sang her special verse in the Puff the Magic Dragon song where she goes to visit Puff.  E whispering to me I love you very very very very very very much and I love tank very much too and daddy. E asking about why the cars went under the water because she saw a video of it on a tablet; how she was concerned for the people in their cars in a naïve child-like way but didn't really understand the danger but understood that it was a scary thing.  The way Tank talked and talked and talked and talked today both when we went out to lunch, and then tonight when he was trying to not go to sleep. The boy has a lot to say.

 It was just an ordinary day. And I hope I never forget it.

Death and Pets

"Mommy, that's the kind of puppy I want, when daddy dies."

"Ms. Elaina got trapped in the slime and no one can rescue her so she died"

"Mommy, when you're dead, you don't eat ice cream anymore"

"I'm sending the bubbles up to V. like the balloons."

These kinds of comments are pretty much a daily occurrence.  My 3 year old has learned about death.  This is entirely my fault and for tragic reasons.  I've been wanting to write about this for a while, but haven't been able to.

Back in December a former student of mine, a wonderful, bright, funny, talented, 10th grader and her amazing sister were in a car accident and for V (the 10th grader) it was a fatal one.  I was the first of her teachers to find out and it happened during Winter Break.  So the responsibility of telling everyone, making contact with the family and such fell to me for the first while.

It was heartbreaking and terrifying and I'm still not able to verbalize what it means to me to lose a student in such a way.  But the event also had an effect on E.

I had to go to the funeral.  I wanted to go to support her family, since I was one of the first school people to respond to the accident and show up at the hospital.  Plus I really love both girls, like I love all my students and I wanted to be there for the surviving sister.  But, the funeral was the same day as a Texans playoff game that Ken had tickets to.  Maybe I should have gotten a baby sitter.  Maybe I should have just stayed home, but in the end I took both kids with me to the funeral.  Thinking I would be able to distract E with the tablet.  I told her the very basics.  V had died.  We were going to a church to remember her and be there to support her family.  E didn't ask many questions.

But E is incredibly empathetic and aware.  Once emotions started, the tablet lost all interest.  She wanted to know what was going on, why people were crying, how V died.  She was very very very well behaved and whispered all her questions and accepted simple answers and several "I'll explain later"s.  She was even very well behaved when we went to the burial site.  She participated in the balloon release (because 3 year olds can't be around balloons without getting one) and was fascinated by the heavy machinery that was there.

And once we left, the questions started to flow.  Now I'm agnostic and Ken is Christian so I tried to answer her questions with information from both sides.  Though most of her questions were not so much about what happens after you die.  (Mommy's answer: some people believe that the energy that makes you up goes to Heaven and lives there.  Other people believe that your energy is sent back out all around the world and becomes part of the world again.  But your body doesn't work anymore.  You don't move or talk.  And you never come back)

Now, death is just a part of her play.  I don't know how firm her grasp is on it, but she brings it up in play, which tells me she is processing it.  It seems like such a heavy subject for such a little girl.  Sometimes I feel like a bad mom for having exposed her to it so early.

But really most of the time she links death and pets.  I think she's processing both things which leads to darkly comical statements like those above.  But she really wants a pet and know's it most likely won't happen while Daddy is around.  So she's experimenting with ways to get pets

So far she's come up with Daddy dying and her going off to college.

"mommy, when I'm bigger and go to college, I want to get a real pet.  a kitty and a puppy. and I will live in my own house"

"daddy, when I'm 28 I will go to college and have my own house with a kitty and a puppy, and I will be able to drive"

Really though, my 3 year old is planning out her college life for when she's 28.  How did she get so old thinking so quickly?

Tank at 4 months

mommy combed my wet hair...
it got crazy again once it dried

Somehow I missed 3 months.

In the last two months this little guy has turned from a needy baby lumpkin into a little ball of personality.

Everyone still remarks on the hair...because how can you not, but the second thing everyone remarks on is how happy he is.  He is just a happy guy 95% of the time.  He only cries when he's hungry, lonely, or dirty.

His vital stats at 4 months are:
14 lbs 13 oz (32%ile)
24 inches on the nose (6.3%ile)
16.9 inches (80.5%ile)

He seems so big to me, especially when he's next to E, but he's actually turning out to be a little guy.  Pretty short, pretty light and he's got a pretty big head.

He's gained fantastic control of his head.  He can track things across the room and all around the room. He's also getting great control of his hands.  He can grasp objects and twist his twisty rattle.  He likes to hold onto his wubbanub while he's falling asleep and he can maneuver it around to suit his needs.

He rolled over from tummy to back several times early on, but seems to forget how to occasionally now.  He's getting pretty close to rolling onto his tummy from his back, he's gotten up on his side a few times.

He loves to bit and chew and is a drool monster.  He started really drooling around 3 months, It got so bad I had to start sending drool bibs to school because they were having to change his clothes just because he was soaking them in drool.  He loves the bite and chew on things, especially mommy and daddy's fingers.  And he's not sucking on them, he is genuinely biting down.

He also had his first nasty cold/upper respiratory infection.  Viral.  He was so miserable and snotty.  He had to get a chest x-ray, which is a horrible experience.  He also had his first ear infection and first round of anti-biotics.

He still loves to watch his sister.  She can elicit laughs out of her like no one else.  He seems to really like the other babies at daycare too.  I was there at drop off and put him near L (a 7 month old little girl) and he just laughed and smiled and she was happy to see him too.  It was very cute.  

He sleeps in his bassinet to start out the night, and usually gets up 2 times a night.  Sometimes he wants to sleep with mommy after getting up to eat, and sometimes mommy kind of falls asleep while nursing him so he spends some time bed-sharing, though I really try to move him back to the bassinet as often as possible.

We were out on a family date for ice cream the other night and there was a table full of high school boys next to us and I kept juxtaposing my little boy with them and it's so hard to believe he will be one in the future.  I hope he's still just a happy, sweet guy then too.

Tank at 2 months

Tank at 2 months:
13 lbs 2 oz (71%)
22.88 inches long (44%)
16 inch circumference head (89%)

So, he's big, short and has a big head, though not as overly large as his sister's.

he likes:
cuddling
"talking" to his family
"playing" with his Yeti
Watching his big sister do anything, but especially watching her dance
being outside
being in his carrier
Playing in his ball pit

He does not like:
wet/dirty diapers
being in a room alone
being down in his bouncy seat when everyone else is up at the table.
His carseat
He can:
hold his head up
smile
coo
hold his binky in his mouth with the back of his hand
sit up in his bumbo seat for a few minutes at a time
grasp objects, mostly on accident, but kind of on purpose
track objects across the room
he does this little happy jig when he sees someone and knows he's going to be picked up.  It's kind of a combination of crazy arm and leg flail and whole body wiggle.

He burps and farts like a frat boy.  Though you really have to work for the burps.
He spits up a lot, and by a lot I mean both frequently and copiously.
His hair is indescribable.  Pictures don't do it justice.  It's slightly curly.  It's super soft.  It has light tips like we gave him highlights. He has a cowlick right in the center of his forehead that gives  him this perfect little superman curl.

Daycare Day 1 Done

Today was Tank's first day of daycare.  E's first day ended in tears.  I'm happy to say that Tank's was not so dramatic.  Granted he was a 2 minute walk away from me, where E was a 30 minute drive and the longest I was away from him was just over 2 hours.  But it went well.

I dropped E off at 1030.  She ran in and her teachers said "Oh, E welcome back, we missed you!"  one of her little friends piped up "I missed you too!"  and she tossed her backpack in the middle of the floor and was happily playing.

I didn't drop Tank off until 12, because I wanted to show him of a bit.  I fed him at 1130 and then got ready to hand him over.  He promptly spit up all over me, smiled, and went happily to his teacher.  I'd planned on just going over to the daycare whenever he needed feeding so I told the teachers to text me if he seemed hungry, otherwise I'd come over in 3 hours.

An hour later I got a text saying he was hungry.  Now he'd eaten only an hour before.  At home the lad goes 3-4 hours between feedings so I knew there was NO WAY he was hungry.  So....I ignored it.  An hour later I got another text saying he was hungry. This time I went over, knowing there was still no way he was hungry but wanting to check on him and there was a break in the schedule anyway.

He was happily sitting in a bouncy chair, not crying, not frantically sucking at his hands, just chilling.  I decided to try to feed him anyway.  He ate for about 3 minutes and then popped off and looked up at me and smiled.  And stuck his tongue out at me and gave me the biggest grin possible.

The little stinker was not hungry at all, he just wanted mama.  Not that I really minded.  I remember wishing E would show that she was happy to see me.

I got another text saying he was hungry right at the end of the day.  By the time I got to the daycare, he was zonked out asleep...obviously not hungry.

Despite the frequent texts, the day went great.  E was happy to be back.  Tank did great.  My schedule is going to be pretty slammed so I will probably not be able to go feed him.  This makes me a little sad, but it won't be a big deal to pump at night and send him with a bottle.  It will be a bit of an adjustment, but all things are.

E's wisdom on burping and cats

Ken: Give that lad to the burp-master!
*takes the baby to burp him*

E: Daddy, you are the burp-master

Ken: yes!

E:...and Tank is the spit-up master!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

E: Daddy can we have a cat? Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?

Ken: no, cats make me sick.

Later, playing with her lego family.

E: oh, we need the cat.  but the cat will make the daddy sick.  That's okay, we don't need a daddy.
*picks up the daddy figurine and tosses him across the room*

Welcome M3 - aka Tank

E was born at 39 weeks 2 days.  I went into labor on my own.

Her little brother decided he was nice and comfy just where he was.  At 37 weeks I was 3 cm dilated.  "it could be tonight, it could be weeks" the doctor said and then she offered to strip my membranes to try to induce labor.  Nothing happened.

At 39 weeks I had a cold, the whole family did, there was a horrible storm inbound and Oma was still 3 days out of being there to take care of E. It would have been a horrible weekend and I was already 4-4.5 cm dilated.  The doctor mentioned she really didn't want me going past 40 weeks because the baby was already seeming large.  She mentioned that maybe we should do an induction if nothing happened.  Of course we figured Tank would try to be dramatic and make his appearance then, probably at the height of the flooding and rain, just to keep this interesting on the 45 minute drive to the hospital.

I started freaking out.  What if it was flooded?  Where would E go?  Who would take her? Would we have to take her to the hospital with us?  Would Ken have to miss the birth?  I think at one point we had 5 friends on standby to come up/ take E.  Shelby drove up Saturday when the rains started to get really bad, just in case, so that E would have someone at home if Mommy and Daddy needed to go.  I had contractions for a few hours in the middle of the night, I lay awake on the couch trying to time them and not freak out.

But...nothing happened.  The contractions fizzled out.  The rain stopped.  The flooding abated.  Oma arrived safely.  No baby.

So at my "40" (39 weeks 5 days) week appointment I mentioned induction.  The doc said they'd call me with a time once they'd contacted the hospital.  Less than an hour later we had an eviction time and date.  5 am the next day!

They made me come in and pick up some instructions and after reading them I started to freak out. The instructions made it sound like I was going in for surgery.  No food or drink after midnight.  Not even water.  I had to take two special showers with a pre-surgical prep soap "paying special attention to the lower abdomen and crotch".  Did they think I was going to have a C-section?  Why were they having me do pre-surgery prep?

After not much sleep I called in to the hospital at 330 am to see if they still had space for me to come in.  Got the green light. So into the shower for the second special shower and off to the hospital we went.

This time was so different...no triage room, no checks, no monitoring.  Just straight into a birthing suite.  IV in, medical questions asked, and at 6 am they started my pitocin drip.

Started getting some contractions, tried to rest and watched a lot of NCIS.  Around 830 the doctor arrived and checked me.  She guessed he was going to weigh around 8 lbs.  Progressing along, but he was still super high up, he didn't want to leave.  She broke my water and let me get out of bed.  I opted for the birthing ball and that felt much, much better than the bed.  Watched some more NCIS, chatted with Ken.  Labored along.  The contractions started getting much stronger, though they didn't register as so on the monitor.  I was waiting for the kick you in the crotch kind of sensation I'd gotten with E when active labor really started, because I knew I wanted my epidural at that point.

Around 1030 I still hadn't had the sensation, the monitor was still reading very small contractions, but I was feeling them so much more than the monitor showed.  So, I asked for the epidural.  They ran a bag of fluid into me (SOP), it took about half an hour. Then they kicked Ken out of the room (SOP) and the anesthesiologist came in.  I had two nurses with me, one was shadowing my actual nurse and she was a midwife.  It was nice having the extra support there, especially since Ken could not be in the room for the epidural.  They numbed up my spine and then tried to insert the epidural needle.  I felt the needle going in and down my spine like hot acid shooting up and down my right side.  I cried out and told them I could feel it.  They backed the needle back out and tried numbing my spine some more.  They tried again.  Hot acid down my right side and a contraction at the same time.  I started sobbing.  They tried a third time, waiting a little longer for the numbing medicine to work and success.  So much relief.

It was a different epidural experience for me than with E.  I could still easily move both of my legs, and I could still feel the contractions, but only in my butt.  It was a really odd sensation.  Everywhere else was numb.  It was really distracting and made me totally fearful of pooping during delivery.

They checked me 6.5 cm dilated but he was still too high up.  So they brought in the peanut ball.  It's like an exercise ball but it's shaped like a peanut.  Since I was stuck in bed I had to lay with it instead of sit on it.  To help take my mind off things Ken and I played some Star Realms.  We played two games (I won the first, he won the second) and then they came to check me again.  In the 40 minutes we'd been playing I went from a 6.5 to a 9.5 and he'd come down into place.  It was go time!

I pushed for about half an hour.  I could still feel the contractions and had a good sense of when I needed to push. I'd debated trying for a med-free birth, because I wanted to experience it, and I kind of got my wish.  While I couldn't feel any pain in my back or stomach, I could still feel everything else.  I could feel him emerge (and they aren't joking when they call it the "ring of fire").  He had the cord around his neck when he came out, they had to cut it immediately and then he was up, out and on my chest.

He was so big and he was so purple.  So purple.  And not really breathing.  And my heart sank into my stomach.  They whisked him away to the warmer and kept saying "he's okay, he's just in shock, like when you jump into cold water. He'll breath in a second.  We're going to make him mad."  They were rubbing him vigorously on the warmer.  All I could see was how purple he was.

And then he cried and the world was okay again.

They gave him to me and delayed all the newborn measurements so that he and I could snuggle and bond.

Eventually they did weigh and measure him. They heard us call him "Tank" and said it was an appropriate nick name for him because he was so big.

at 1:35 pm on 10/28/15 Tank was born weighing in at 9lbs 0.4 oz and 20.5 inches long.

3 Things I don't want to forget

With the impending arrival of baby boy, there is so much going on, and so little sleep happening that sometimes my brain feels like Swiss cheese or a colander. So I'm trying to document a few things that have been happening in the last few weeks.

Thing I don't want to forget(tidwtf) #1 - ren fest

We went to the Renaissance festival to celebrate our 5th anniversary. It's such a fun tradition, and this

time all of us, even E, got to dress up.  I had to rent a costume, since pretty much none of my clothes fit, as little man has made me look and feel much more pregnant than his sister ever did. We looked pretty good as a family and the festival is so much more fun dressed up, especially with an extraordinarily cute kid with you, the paid actors all interact with you more, they fawn over the kid and give you things they normally wouldn't give to others. It was awesome.

E was our little autumn fairy warrior and she loved it! We have been telling stories about the fairies, last year she got a fairy stone from the face court, and our stoies are about how the stone allows E to travel to the realm of fairy and play with the fairies, especially Dog fairy and Cat fairy, so we were in the hunt for the fairies. E was enraptured by all the people in costume, a little intimidated by the more creepy/scary costumes like the dragons, but still highly curious. She would pipe up occasionally "they're just people dressed up, pretending, right?"  But this grasp on reality didn't hold true for the fairies, the fairies are real, and around them she could fly.


So of course when she asked to "fly" we let her. She barely weighed enough to meet the minimum requirements, and the attendant didn't even take our money until after she was sure the harness would fit. It did, just barely. I was completely prepared for her to get strapped in, go for one "flight", panic, and want down. But that didn't happen. The attendant started her out with just a little bounce and as she got more and more comfortable he started launching her higher. The higher she flew, the bigger her grin got. She LOVED it.  She looked so brave and fearless like a picture out of Peter Pan.

It was a fantastic day, filled with friends, elephant rides, circus shows, jousts, pony rides, 'fishing', 'flying', bells, flags and tri-colored icees.  E was absolutely spoiled by everyone.  The gold fairy gave her bubbles, the purple fairy gave her a new fairy jewel, the Owlchemist gave her a gold dipped feather.  Our friend's dad bought her a joust flag to cheer on the knights "Go blue!" The garland sales girls gave her bells to hang off her garland.  The Icee vendor let her have 3 colors, though he told our friend that they only gave out 1 color.

We searched and searched for the fairy court, visiting their throne room in the garden twice but were never able to find the faeries.  I thought E would be devastated, but she simply stated "we couldn't find the faeries, they were hidin' "  E lasted until about 3 and then asked to be picked up by Auntie Shelby (who she'd clung to like a barnacle all day) because "my foot is starting to hurt a little bit".  She got super comfy and cozy in Shebly's arms and then once she transfered to Daddy because we were leaving, promptly fell asleep in Daddy's arms.

TIDWTF #2 -sweet sister

E is excited about being a big sister.  She tells everyone there is a "baby in mama's womb"  or "I'm going to have a baby soon!"  She's already possessive of him. "That's MY baby"
Currently I've been sleeping on the couch because of issues with getting comfortable and E has moved into her big girl bed, with no baby gate on the door.  So when she wakes up in the morning she comes out to me on the couch and greets me with "good morning mama." and then immediately follows it with "good morning baby" and she loves to give him hugs and kisses.  She likes to talk to him, and expects him to talk back via mommy or daddy.  She likes to share her food with him and tell him what he will be able to do when he gets bigger.  She asks me quite frequently if she can "take baby out" yet.

She loves to play with his toys and pretend to be a baby, I hope that she doesn't get super jealous of him once he is actually here. She likes to go into his room and play.  The other day I went in there to put some clothes away and found a very sweet scene.

The rocking chair had been drug to the side of the crib and E's "baby ballerina" doll was tucked into the crib.  Her head was resting on the turtle pillow E picked out for her present to baby brother and wrapped up in a blanket.


TIDWTF #3 - Sleep (or lack there of)

E still doesn't like to sleep.  She actively fights it some nights.  We have kept the same bedtime routine since we started.   When it's time to start the routine we say "it's time to get ready for bed" now when we start to say it she interrupts and shouts "pway!" (play)

Once in bed she sings, talks, reads, plays with her water bottle, her "Rexy" pillow pet, her froggy flashlights, anything she can do to prevent going to bed short of actually getting out of bed.


Once asleep she is restless, she seems to have bad dreams, she wakes up and needs water (we keep a water bottle in her bed).  She wakes up and takes herself to the bathroom (win!).  She wants to be cuddled but doesn't want to be touched.  She cries for me, even when I'm standing right next to her. No wonder she doesn't like to sleep.

Tonight as we were walking out of dinner at dusk she noticed it was getting dark and began insisting "the sun is up!"

I pointed out that the moon was up in the sky, which she knows means it's "sleep time" and so she began to shout out "go away moon!" all the way home.  It was adorable.  She claimed that she was making the moon disappear by putting on her sunglasses.  We played a game with it where we would open the skylight and show her the moon and say "hello moon!" then she would shout "go away moon" and we could close the sklylight....we repeated the game all the way home.

Empathy

I've always thought that empathy is a very valuable character trait.  To be able to understand what other people are feeling so that you can do something about it seems to be grossly lacking.

So, understandably, we talk A LOT about feelings with E.  Her feelings, other's feelings, how her actions affect others, how others' actions affect her feelings.  Daniel Tiger helps with this quite a bit. She loves making people happy, she doesn't like making people sad.  She knows that sad choices are called that because they make people, sometimes her included, sad.  But I thought that her empathy still mostly revolved around her.

Today, she proved me wrong.

We were at Little Gym, it was the first day of the new season, so a new class.  Her bff from her previous class moved up a level so she wasn't there to play with.  It was a really small class, only 3 girls and their moms.  One of the girls E had been in classes with before and they parallel play well together.  E was happy to see her.  The other girl was new to us, but apparently not new to Gym, and she was having a rough time.

Normally kids having a rough time cry a lot, but this girl didn't cry, she just refused to participate.  Up to the point that she was lying on the uneven bar mat, in a corner of the gym, sucking her thumb in silence.  Her mom was visibly distressed. E was running around playing and then stopped and came back to me to ask

"I lay down with A?"

I figured she wanted A to play, she'd been trying to engage her off and on throughout the class, and said "sure"

E went over and lay down near A on the mat and put her thumb in her mouth.  The two girls lay there together.  That was it for the moment, they just lay there.  While E was laying there I talked to A's mom.  She was at the point that she was considering withdrawing A from Gym.  A had panic attacks in gym and refused to participate.  She switched down to a younger class so she could be in the gym with A to see if that made it better, but A was still having a rough time.  As we were talking I heard giggling, we looked over to see the two girls laying on the mat smiling and giggling at each other.

E jumped up and went to the bars with a smile and a "come swing with me!"

And A followed and it was like a weight was lifted off both A and her mom.

The girls played until E had to go to the bathroom, with the third girl joining them.

In the restroom, E looked at me and said, unprompted,

"A was scared.  I helped her"

And then we were back in gym and everyone was playing and having fun, I don't know if A will be back next week or not, but I don't think I've ever been more proud of my sweet, empathetic, compassionate little girl.